9. Conference with parents

After watching two videos about conferences with parents, we've tried to decide what are the points to bear in mind in a conference with parents.





These are some of the conclusions I've arrived to during the class and after it:

• A good welcome is crucial because it will set the atmosphere of the conference. Welcoming the mother at the door and accompanying her, trying to be close and friendly, chatting with her/him about something irrelevant at first to break the ice. Sitting in a way that you are not confronted but can hold her glance in a friendly way and the door is closed so there is a feeling of confidentiality.
• The conference has to be prepared in advanced. Goals, documentation of the child needed... It is very useful to send the parents a note with the goals to be achieved in the meeting. It is also needed to talk with the child and explain her/him what the conference will consist on.
• The ideal time for a conference is about 20 minutes. It has to be scheduled and the teacher should remember the mother/father about it so the other parents don't have to wait. It allows to structure better the time and it helps both parts of the conference to get to the point of the meeting.
• When you need to say something that is not positive at all, it is important to frame it between positive things. This way of making constructive criticism is known at Carlos Cano school (the place where I've been doing my practicum) as the sandwich technique. Which means starting by reinforcing something positive about the child, then the things that bother you or that need to be improved and to finish something positive again to end with a good feeling.
• It is very important to have proofs that stand the assessment criteria. So the teacher can show them to the mam to reinforce what it is being said (works of the child to show development, exams...) It is very useful to try to find the causes and not just stick to the results. A good way to organize it is to have a folder for each child. 
• It is a good point to make feel the mother that you want both to work as a team. She is not alone with the problem, the teacher is not either.
• The language used has to be as clear as possible. Educative jargon should be avoided in order everyone to understand the content of what is being said.
• It is very worthwhile to have a written schema so nothing is forgotten. 
• Once the conference is arriving to an end, the teacher should fix the next appointment and she has to check that the mother has understood what to do (if there is any instruction until the next conference).
• After the conference, the teacher need some time to organize what happened. It is very useful to carry out a self-assessment: How was it? What would I have done different? Are the aims I proposed fulfilled? It is also very useful to send the mother an evaluation sheet with the conclusions of the conference, the things they have agreed they would do at home until next meeting and the date of the next meeting. If there is no content enough to send a conclusion sheet it can be substituted by a note saying thank you for coming.

Self-reflection:

Through seeing some videos about conferences with parents we have learned a lot comparing what we saw with our own experience as students.

For me the main reflection about this session is not about the conference itself (I think we have learnt lots of things that will improve them when we have to do them) but about how families are conceived at school.

In most of the schools, the board of teachers tend to think that families don't have to contribute in the educational process, the farther they are the better... Putting forward their ignorance about educational topics  some schools put parents out of the way.

I've been experiencing this year amazing results when you include families in every possible way. Once teachers see them as friends instead of enemies cooperation between both may help a lot the child.